14 August 2016

Of Dragons, Dicks, and Rockfish


The other day I found myself ungracefully sprawled across a piece of plywood on the foam of the biggest crash pad to be found this side of the continental divide. Ok, well maybe not the biggest but you get the point. 

As I hastily pull my hair into a messy braid only Katniss Everdeen or Pippi Longstocking could be proud of, I reach for the wood glue only to find it held captive by the fellow Atlantan-turned-Montanan climber beside me.

“What do you want it to be?” he asks. “What do you want me to draw?’”

I throw a cursory glance his way as I think only to realize that he’s already drawn a giant dick with wood glue on the layers of matting we are about to overlap and release a stupefied laugh. He grins, we slather the glue across the sheet, flip the folds of fabric onto each other, smooth them down, and repeat.

When I returned from expedition this week, this girl didn’t anticipate spending multiple days in a row inside under fluorescent lights voluntarily working as manual labor. The plan was actually be as far as possible away from town backpacking for a week in Waterton International Peace Park after a laughably rainy dayhike involving a considerably long break spent drying in a chalet & hitchhiking home.  

After I found said ladies a ride to their car, they blasted off towards Canada. As I packed my bag to join, a friend shot me a text asking if I wanted to help a compadre finish up construction on his new bouldering gym of a dream in Whitefish instead.

Call me crazy but I tend to say yes to things on a whim based on instinct. Some might call it spontaneity, others “trusting your gut.” If something doesn’t feel right, don’t do it. If you’re drawn towards something (or someone) for some inexplicable reason, dive on in as the reason will surely become clear later. Jobs, hitchhiking, adventures- this applies to all. Our ancestors used to rely heavily on instinct & intuition without causing the downfall of man, why shouldn’t we?

Anyways.

Instinct steered me to the gym rather than trail and necessity plopped us in the middle of its floor.

So there we landed on the crash pad, glue and brushes in hand, dispersing the hastily drawn outlines of dragons, dogs, and dicks into oblivion to become a part of something bigger: the foundations cushioning the falls of many climbers to come. While I was only a part of the process for the last few days leading to their opening, the passion and dedication of the team that has worked tirelessly since May to make climber concept become tangible T-Nuts and holds is inescapable in the very best way possible. 

Today we got to sprawl across these untrammeled and almost finished floors, tomorrow and in the weeks to come it will be innumerable groups of friends sprawling while waiting their turns for a go on the next route. There will be peals of laughter and cheers as previously unknown folks-turned friends become (very much still alive) fallen comrades rocketing off the wall after topping out. There will be tall tales told amidst the crowd enthralling all with renditions of adventures past and mutterings of adventures future.


Today this is a bouldering gym in construction, tomorrow it’s a community of outdoor badasses.  Yes this is a shameless plug for the group of folks at Rockfish who deserve it and your money for all their hard work. No, they don't know these words are being written. It’s not even open yet and I can already tell it will be my second home this winter (don’t tell my ski boots I’m cheating on them with climbing shoes). Only one question remains to be seen: will it be yours?


17 June 2016

Twenty Minutes, Two Miles

At the end of the day, what do you want your last thought to be when you go to bed?

Do you want it to be about your regrets? Things you wish you hadn’t done? Things you wished you’d had? That rattlesnake you saw slithering through camp as you contemplated sleeping under the stars?

I’m young. I don’t have all the answers. Nor do I pretend to. 

I lead expeditions with and for veterans with disabilities via No Barriers USA. 

I travel.

I hike.

I experience life through as many lenses as there are people on the trail every single day.


Today I emerged from the Gila. This journey was not about me though. No, today we emerged. 19 individuals turned into one infallible rope team. The fibers of our respective twines bound into one cord. A cord with enough give to allow for growth but enough strength to hold steadfast in times of need. 

We talk a lot on these trips. Sometimes it's about me, mostly it’s about others. It begins with talk of struggles, fears, families, dreams, pasts, tears. Tears morph into laughter, laughter bolsters strength, strength ushers in hope. Hope for the present, visions of a future. Futures where fears hopefully aren’t the guiding principle and where goals are attainable no matter the barriers- no matter if they are twenty minutes or two miles away (you W2S folks know what I mean).

Today we emerged from the Gila. A rope team. A family

I often feel a loss at the end of these trips— not because I am sad but because my heart is so full it does not know quite how to function as it processes all those moments from days preceding. All those smiles, grimaces, tears, leaps of faith (or leaps away from snakes hunting frogs in hot springs), and mounds of undeniably unfiltered & unfettered laughter.


When I look at my life, I lead a pretty simple one. 
I don’t have a house, I don’t even have a rental place to live (by choice). Hell, right now I don’t even have an official storage unit— merely a space in a friend’s garage to place what physical belongings I do have. 

Many of us stock our success based on the physical things we are able to afford— homes, cars, vacations, computers. The list goes on for all the belongings we collect over the years. We think that if we can just afford that next greatest thing our voids will be filled.

If all my belongings were to catastrophically be demolished tomorrow though, I know I will be ok. Why? 

These expeditions.

This rope team. My rope teams.


More dear to me than physical goods are the memories, the connections to others fostered along the trail, in the heart, and on the mind. Those “others” whose presence in my life allow me to do what I do. Those who have made & continue to shape me into the person that I am whether they realize it or not. 

When I fall asleep at night, my last thoughts are of you all. The ones who have made me laugh and the ones who have challenged me. The ones who have filled my heart to the brim overflowing. The ones who were willing to open up & embrace growth. 



Here’s to you, Gila Misfits.